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Charlotte Mason in Modern English

Charlotte Mason's ideas are too important not to be understood and implemented in the 21st century, but her Victorian style of writing sometimes prevents parents from attempting to read her books. This is an imperfect attempt to make Charlotte's words accessible to modern parents. You may read these, print them out, share them freely--but they are copyrighted to me, so please don't post or publish them without asking.
~L. N. Laurio


PART III

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'Habit Is Ten Natures'

I.--Education Based Upon Natural Law

A Healthy Brain

What I would like to present to readers is a method of education that's based on natural laws. We have already discussed how to keep the physical brain healthy. Only when the brain is properly nourished and active can real education have any effect.

Outdoor Life

We already discussed the role of outdoor life in a good education. A child's main purpose for his first 6 or 7 years is to find out everything he can about everything he sees, hears, feels. He is never tired of learning about whatever comes his way. Therefore, the parents' first priority should be putting as much of nature as possible within the child's notice. A young child's academic education should be totally comprised of the freedom to observe things. The early stages of mental development are made up of

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extreme brain activity as the child observes and discovers things in his world. Wise educators will acknowledge God's design in the way individuals evolve and grow, and will make their efforts conform to that design.

The next topic we need to consider is dry and technical, dealing with mental/physical matters, but very necessary in any reasonable method of education.

Habit Is The Tool That Parents Use

A well-trained habit can overcome many inherited natures. If only I could express how much this means to anyone who wants to teach children! If only every mother understood how habit, in her knowing hand, is as useful a tool as the wheel to a potter, or the knife to a carver. With this instrument--habit--she can conceive of what she wants her child to be like, and then she can help him to become that! Note that the raw material is already there. Even a wheel won't help a potter create a porcelain vase if all he has to start with is backyard dirt. Yet, without his potter's wheel, he couldn't turn even the finest clay into anything nice. I don't like to talk much about myself, but if you, the reader, don't mind, I'd like to explain my discovery. These are the steps that led to my 'aha!' moment and helped me to understand that, with the tool of habit, a parent can make his child become almost whatever he wants. However, what is one person's 'aha!' moment will mean nothing to someone else unless it is explained using the baby steps he took to arrive at that revelation. So, I'll explain how I came to this remarkable knowledge. There are three possible perspectives from which to arrive at this conclusion, but for me, it was this: That forming good habits is what an education is made of. Education is merely forming the right habits.

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II. Children Have No Power to Compel Themselves

An Educational Cul-de-sac

A few years ago I used to hear sermons every month that said that a well-trained habit can overcome many inherited natures. I was a young, idealistic teacher just starting out. I thought it was a wonderful thing to be a teacher, because a teacher leaves a permanent influence on her impressionable pupils. If the children didn't turn out right, it was the teacher's fault. In my zeal, I felt that the teacher's part in what the child became was immense. But even with all my enthusiasm, the results were disappointing. Nothing extraordinary happened. My students were generally good children who had been brought up by conscientious parents. But they tended to act in accordance with their inborn traits. Whatever faults they had didn't get any better. Whatever shining virtues were in them naturally tended to be exercised sporadically at best. The well-behaved, gentle girl still told lies. The intelligent, giving child was hopelessly lazy. It was the same with their lessons. The child who tended to dawdle kept on dawdling. The slow child made no progress. It was utterly disappointing. The children did passably, but each of these children had in them the makings of an excellent character, or a brilliant mind. Where was the key that could unlock the potential in each of these children, who were as a world unto themselves? There has to be a key. The monotony of geography maps and French vocabulary and history books and math worksheets was just playing at education. After all, who ever really remembers the trivial bits of facts that he struggled to memorize in school?

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And couldn't those facts be just as easily learned in a few hours later, rather than spending a whole year with the drudgery of school? If education is going to help the individual and the human race to progress, then it must have more relevance to life than plodding along at small, trivial tasks that amount to nothing more than busywork.

Love, Law, and Religion as Educational Forces

I wanted answers, so I looked through some texts about education. I found various bits of helpful information in different books, but no one book seemed to offer any real answer of how to unlock the possibilities within a child, and how to make education apply towards that effort. I saw that religious teaching gave children a motive and the ability to try their best, and it raised them up so that they chose higher priorities. Knowing Biblical laws helped keep them from doing the wrong things. Having God's love within helped them want to do good. But even with these things and divine help, I still felt like I was laboring in the dark. In morality, the children's progress seemed to be 'one step forward and two steps back.' As children advanced from one grade to the next, they didn't seem to have made any progress beyond being able to calculate harder math problems and read harder books.

Why Children Aren't Capable of Steady Effort

When I thought about it, it was clear why they failed. Each child had enough spark of goodness to be capable of doing good, but they were unable to be consistent because they had no will power strong enough to make themselves do what they knew was right. And here is where the teacher should be helping. The teacher should

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be able to make children do what they don't have the will power to make themselves do. But that's only the beginning. Children can't remain dependent on their teacher to make them choose right. It is the job of education to find a way to supplement their will power, which is not weak only in children, but in most of us grown-ups, too.

Children Should be Spared the Effort of Decision

Preachers have rightly said that the most exhausting effort in life is making decisions. Even we adults have a hard time deciding about trivial matters such as, 'Should I go or not?' and 'Which one should I buy?' It's not fair to make children endure the work and stress of making every decision between right and wrong if they don't have to.

III. What Is 'Nature'?

'One habit is as good as TEN natures,' kept being repeated to me until, finally, the light bulb came on and I had an 'Aha!' moment as I realized that this might be the key I had been looking for to unlock children's potential. So I asked myself, what exactly is nature? And what is habit?

It really is amazing when we stop to consider all that a child is, just because he was made that way, no matter what his race, what country he was born in, or who his family is.

All People Are Born with the Same Primary Desires

Anyone will admit that all people have the same instincts and desires. But  it's not so easy to see that we all have the same principles of action, and that the same desires are inherent in the most uneducated native of the poorest third world country as well as in a refined Harvard scholar. The desire for knowledge that we see in every child's curiosity about everything in the world around him

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and his looking wide-eyed at all he sees is born into all children. The desire for the company of others is witnessed any time you put two babies together and see their joy and excitement at seeing a baby like themselves. That desire for society is what makes primitive natives dwell in village communities, and it's what makes educated men organize philosophical discussion groups. All people want to be appreciated. This desire for esteem can be a mighty tool in the hands of a teacher whose every word of praise or reprimand motivates more than any reward or threat of punishment.

All People Are Born with the Same Affections

People don't just have the same desires, they also have the same affections and longings, and these act the same in all people when roused. Joy, grief, love, resentment, compassion, sympathy, fear and many other emotions are common to all of us. We also all have a conscience  and a sense of duty.

The Most Foundational Notion About Human Nature

David Livingstone, missionary to Zambezi tribes in Africa, wrote how similar their law was to England's, although they didn't always follow their own laws. When he was asked to make up a moral code for them, he only needed to add to their own code that their men should only have one wife. They already knew that evil speaking, lying, hatred, disobeying or neglecting parents, were wrong, even though neither Christianity nor even any civilized teaching had never reached them. A sense of duty is common to all people, and so is a consciousness that there is a God, although that consciousness may be vague. All of these things are elemental to human nature and an inherent part of the human condition.

Human Nature Plus Heredity

To all these traits of human-ness are added inherited tendencies, and this is where those ten natures enter in. A child can inherit a tendency to be resentful or stubborn or reck-

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less--it's just born in him, passed along from his mother or grandfather. Everyone has seen the certain way a son squints his eyes that's just like his father, or a quirky movement of the hand that gets passed down from father to son. Or, handwriting may pass down the family line, as it did with a Miss Power Cobbe, whose handwriting was said to have been passed on from five generations. An artistic temperament, or a taste for music can run in families. Inherited traits are a twist added to human nature, and seemingly immune to any attempt to change or modify it.

Human Nature Plus Physical Conditions

Physical health also affects people. A small, sickly child and a sturdy street child who is never sick will have varying strengths in their desires and emotions.

Human Nature is the Sum Total of Certain Attributes

Between desires, affections and emotions that are common to the human race, inherited traits and physical constitution, we might assume that so much is out of our control that all we can do is step back and leave every child to grow unhindered, as free and natural as the wind, according to his unique disposition.

The Child Must Not be Left to his Human Nature

And that's exactly what half of all parents, and even more teachers, do. And what is the result? The world is advancing with new discoveries, but real progress is mostly happening among the few parents who take education seriously. The rest of the world will end up just staying where they

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are, no better than what Nature made them, and they will drag the world down. They won't simply stay as they are, that would be bad enough. But everyone knows that a child who isn't being raised to a higher standard is sinking lower and lower. So a parent is just as obligated to train his child's intelligence and moral strength and purpose as he is to feed and clothe him. And he must do this in spite of his inborn nature. It may be true that there are exceptions--we've all heard of cases where a young man overcame neglect and raised himself up by his bootstraps and made a good life for himself against all odds because circumstances made it necessary for him to do so, but this is a bolt of unusual luck. Teachers can't count on this kind of thing to save children from their own neglect.

I was beginning to understand, but there was still the psychological problem that blocked any real progress in education. At least now I could put my finger on the problem:

A child's will is weak. In children of weak parents, it is weaker, in children of strong parents, it is stronger. But hardly ever does a child have enough will to count on its effectiveness in education.

All that a child is born with--his human nature, his inherited tendencies, his physical constitution, are incredibly difficult to overcome.

The Problem before the Educator

The teacher's problem is how to enable the child to gain control over his own nature, to not be enslaved by even his better traits. Many people have ruined their lives from overdoing the very traits

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that they considered assets, such as generosity.

Divine Grace Works in Conjunction With Human Effort

In seeking a solution to this dilemma, I am not overlooking Divine grace, far from it. But we sometimes forget that grace can be the added benefit of educated effort. For example, the parent who takes the time to understand education deserves and gets support from God. Rebecca in the Bible had no right to neglect raising her son Jacob correctly in the hopes that God's grace would fill in the gaps and pull him through. He was a religious man raised by committed parents, so he did pull through okay in spite of her failure. Yet it made his journey through life harder; even he complained that the days of his life were 'few and evil.'

Parents' Faith in the Work of God Must Not Make Them Relinquish Their Duty

Yet too many Christian parents expect grace to do their work for them. They think they can let their children grow as wild and unruly as a bramble bush, not bothering to curb any bad tendencies. They put their faith in a working of God to prune and dig and prop up as He sees fit in His own good time. That may work out just fine; God often does save a man from himself. But at what cost to the poor man who has to learn the hard way? His parents could have spared him some pain by training early habits that would have resulted in building character.

The force of nature is strong, but not impossible to overcome. Nature should not be given free reign to raise a child according to his own whims. Some firm yet gentle guidance, like a bit and bridle to a pony, at an early age will have the best results. But if Nature is left to herself, no spur or whip will tame her.

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IV. Habit Can Replace 'Nature'

'Habit is ten natures.' Is that true? If it is, then it means that habit is very strong--not just as strong, but ten times as strong as the nature a child is born with. Here we have something stronger that can overcome even the strength of Nature!

Habit Runs on the Lines of Nature

But we find that habit is also influenced and limited by a child's nature. A cowardly child has a habit of lying to stay out of trouble. An affectionate child has loving habits. A generous child has a habit of giving. A selfish child has a habit of hoarding. So, habit, if allowed to go along unguided, will just enhance a child's inborn nature. Habits become a manifestation of the child's natural tendencies, confirmed and strengthened by constantly repeating various habits that he gets used to doing.

But Habit Can be Like a Lever

If habit is going to be a tool to lift the child's character to a higher standard, then habits will have to go against the child's natural inclination.

So we must first of all see if this is possible by trying to find examples of children whose habits are overcoming their natural tendencies. We can think of children who are trained to  be careful not to dirty their clothes. There are children who have been trained to have enough restraint not to divulge family secrets by giving discreet answers to prying questions. Some children have courteous habits so that they graciously make way for their elders and give up their seat on the bus to a poor woman with lots of bags. But some children have been allowed to have grudging habits so that they never give up anything for anyone else.

A Mother Forms her Children's Habits Without Even Realizing It

Are these good and bad habits natural for children? No, they were brought up to have them. Actually, a mother can train her child to have any habit. Most

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mothers have a couple of things that their children never violate, whether they be quirky, insignificant things, or matters of principle. A mother who has some knowledge of how education works won't be able to help the influence of her knowledge infiltrating the kinds of habits she builds up in her children. But a mother whose primary concern is, 'What will people think?' will train her children to have habits of outer behavior rather instead of habits of being persons of integrity on the inside. Her children will be content to look neat, mannerly and nice, but they probably won't work at seeking beauty, living a disciplined life and being kind to others.

Habit Forces Nature into New Channels

We don't really need any illustrations about how powerful a force habit is, we've all seen it in the daredevil who rides two barebacked ponies with a foot on the back of each, or gymnasts leaping high in the air, or a clown as flexible as rubber. Some can even do mental feats. Anything can be done with the right training, by developing the right habits. The power of habit doesn't just work for humans. Cats look for their food in the same place every day if their owner feeds them in the same spot. In fact, cats are such creatures of place habit that they will die of starvation rather than leave the house they're used to. Dogs are also creatures of habit. If you scatter

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crumbs for the sparrows at nine o'clock every morning, then they will start showing up every morning at nine o'clock, even if there are no crumbs. Darwin suggested that animals' fear of man was a transmitted habit passed down from animal to animal. He landed on a Pacific island where the birds had never seen humans before and they flew around him and landed on him with no fear. Alcoholics sadly illustrate the power of habit in their inability to stop drinking in spite of their own reason, their conscience, or religion.

Parents and Teachers Must Lay Down Lines of Habit

This is nothing new, everyone knows that people are just a bundle of habits, and that habit is a powerful force. That's not what was the revelation for me, it was the application that was new. Finding out how habits actually work in the brain and body was also a new idea to me. I hope that what I learned is useful to parents and teachers. It was a new idea for me to understand that it's up to parents and teachers to lay down tracks of habit in children that will allow their lives to run along smoothly without jolting or jumping the track, and will set them in the right direction.

V. Laying Down Of Lines Of Habit

Mary Poppins said, 'Well begun is half done' and that's true of mental and moral habits. If you begin it, it will be completed, although not always the way you intended. Habits can develop on the lines typical for that type of habit. Through our own involuntary

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reasoning, any seed of thought or feeling planted in the mind develops and grows and propagates more of its own kind within the mind, like a living thing. It's a wonderful thing to behold when the idea is a noble one, developing in your mind of its own accord so that you find yourself typing lines that seem to be writing themselves. You find yourself pleased with what you wrote, yet you realize that you had no conscious part in coming up with it. When an experienced author writes a long section in this way, he already knows that he won't need to do much revising because the work is basically correct as is. It is this phenomenon that's responsible for the false idea of infallible reason, an idea that still prevails. Philosophers enjoy the mere process itself of thinking and seeing ideas develop in their own minds. But they forget that it isn't only great thoughts that mature and procreate in the mind. Bad thoughts that defile a person also grow and multiply of their own accord.

We Think as we are Used to Thinking

What does this have to do with educating children? Just this: that we go on thinking in the same way we're used to thinking. Ideas come and go as if our mind was Grand Central Station, and they travel along the ruts we've created for them in the nerve substance of our brain tissue. You may not even deliberately set out to think these thoughts. You may not even want to think them, and thinking how you wish to stop thinking them means you have two trains of thought at the same time! You may put up a 'No Through Traffic' sign, and try hard not to think those thoughts, but to think about something else. But who is able

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to do that? Surely not children, who have immature wills, weak moral powers and no training in spiritual warfare. Children depend on their parents to initiate the thoughts and desires that fill their minds. Parents initiate these thoughts, but that's all. Once a thought is begun in a child's mind, it takes hold and develops itself, resulting in habits that become his character into adulthood.

Direction of Lines of Habit

Railroad tracks on which a train runs is a good analogy of the relationship of habit to our lives. It's easier for a train to stay in the grooves of the track than to leap up and over the tracks to disaster. In the same way, if tracks of good habits are laid down carefully within the child, it will be easier for him to go along those tracks than to run off and endanger himself. The laying down of these tracks is serious business and directly impacts the child's future. The parent should think about which tracks will be most beneficial for the child and lay those down so that the child can go along through life with the least friction. If the tracks are smooth and easy, the child will glide along at a nice pace and never even stop to consider whether he might rather choose another path.

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Habit and Free-will

Doing a specific action over and over again forms a habit. Following a habit faithfully will make that action become second nature and difficult to shake off. Keep it up for ten years, and that habit has as much strength as ten natures, and can't be broken without major unsettling of the person. But, knowing all of this, and knowing that it's possible to form habits in a child that make him feel and do specific things, is this such a good thing? Doesn't this take away the child's free will and turn him into a machine?

Habit Rules Most of our Thoughts and Acts

Whether habits are planned and created conscientously, or allowed to be haphazardly filled in by chance, they are habits all the same. Habit rules 99 percent of everything we do. Parents aren't turning children into creatures of habit, they already are creatures of habit, it's part of our human nature. We think our usual thoughts, make our usual small talk, go through our usual routine without even thinking about it. Imagine if that wasn't the case. If we had to think through each step and make a decision about each and every one, imagine how long it would take to eat a meal or take a shower. Life wouldn't even be worth living. The constant stress of having to think through each step would be so tedious that we'd be exhausted. Thankfully, life isn't that difficult because, for most of what we do, we don't have to consider what to do next. We made a choice once in the beginning and now we just do it by habit. The matters that come up and need to be thought through and decided upon will happen in children's lives as

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often as they do in our own lives. We can't prevent those from occurring, and we shouldn't try. What we can do is to make sure that they have habits that keep their routines orderly, proper and honorable instead of leaving the wheel of their train of life to make random ruts in dark places.

Habit is Powerful Even Where the Will Decides

With the proper habits in place, even when those times come up where the child will have to stop and consider what to do next, he will still have the familiarity of habit to guide him. The boy who is used to learning and enjoying books will be less prone to allow himself to slip into couch-potato behavior along with his peers. The girl who has been carefully trained to accurately tell details is not going to even think of the option of lying when she's in a difficult spot, no matter how timid she is.

But isn't training habits just a way of addressing outward behavioral symptoms? How can doing an act or thinking something a hundred times in a row affect the internal nature of the child? Should we accept it on faith? Maybe not. If we can discover what makes habit such a powerful force, we will be convinced to seek out and lay down the best tracks of habit.

VI. The Physiological Aspect Of Habit

The book Mental Physiology by Dr. Carpenter gave me the first clue I was looking for. It's a very interesting book.

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He explains the analogy between thinking and physical action and shows how the one's effect is a result of the other's cause.

Growing Tissues Mold Themselves to the Way They are Used

Dr. Carpenter is part of the school that believes that human tissue is constantly wearing out and repairing itself by building new tissue. Even physical functions that we take for granted, like walking and standing up straight, are really the result of meticulous training. The things we learn, such as writing or dancing, are also learned with effort, but they become so automatic that we can do them naturally and easily. Why? Because the law of living, growing tissue is that it grows to accommodate whatever action is required of it. When the brain is constantly cuing the muscles to do a specific action, that action will become so automatic in the muscles that even a slight cue from outside will prompt them to respond without the brain having to consciously intervene. A child's joints and muscles grow to accommodate holding and using a pencil. It isn't that the child concentrates and wills with his mind to make the hand write with a pencil in spite of his muscles. It's his newly grown muscles that form themselves to adapt to operating a pencil. And, in this same way, people can be trained to do all kinds of feats and tricks that look impossible to everyone else. Those things are impossible to everyone else, because their muscles haven't been trained to do those

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amazing things with early training.

Therefore Children Should Learn Athletics at an Early Age

So, no activity is merely physical. The brain is affected, too. And this is why children should learn dancing, horseback riding, swimming, gymnastics, every kind of activity that trains the muscles when they're young. Muscles and joints don't just grow new tissue in places that accommodate new activity. They grow in new patterns. The body is much more efficient at growing and adapting when it's young. A man whose muscles are used to sports can learn any new sport fairly easily. But it's very difficult for a farmer who has done mostly plowing to learn to write. His muscles, which are adapted to his work, have a difficult time growing to accommodate an unrelated task. This is why it's so important to be diligent about children's habits in speaking clearly, standing up straight, etc. Children's muscles are forming themselves to accommodate their habits every hour. Shuffling, hunching the shoulders, mumbling are not just quirks to be outgrown when the child is ready. Every day that he continues these habits, they are becoming part of him, making their mark in the very physical substance of his spinal cord. His mind has already pre-set its instructions to the muscles, and reversing it means re-growing all those muscles to a new pattern. For example, correcting a bad habit of speech will no longer be a matter of trying to speak plainly. The child's muscles are grown to do something else and it will take some effort to get them to do what they aren't developed to do. It won't feel natural until some

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new muscles have grown to a new pattern in his speaking muscles as he uses them properly.

Moral and Mental Habits Make Their Mark upon Physical Tissues

Everyone knows that the body will grow to accommodate whatever we make it do. A child who habitually stands on one foot will be prone to having a curved spine. A child who lets his shoulders droop instead of letting his chest expand to breathe deeply will be more susceptible to lung disease. We see evidence of bad habits affecting the body so often that we can't deny the cause and effect relationship. But we don't realize that the habits we can't see, like being flippant, or truthful, or neat, make a physical mark just as much. They influence the way tissue develops in the brain. Habits of mind become physical reality on brain tissue and that's why habit is so powerful. It isn't all in the mind, it's physical, too. The brain is a delicate organ, so it shouldn't be any surprise that what we think leaves its mark in a physical way. Every thought or line of reasoning we entertain a lot makes a well-worn rut in our brain. These ruts make tracks for the train of our lives to glide along, and our trains can only get out of these tracks with extreme effort of our will.

Persistent Trains of Thought

That's why a housewife, when she has a few minutes to let her mind wander, tends to think about household matters. She thinks about the day's dinner, or winter clothes. Her thoughts naturally run into the rut

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she has worn for them by constant repetition of the same thoughts. Mothers tend to think about their children, painters think about pictures, poets think about poems, fathers fret about finances until stressful circumstances drive his anxieties deeper and deeper into those ruts and he goes crazy with being unable to get his mind off his worries. In fact, all of us are susceptible to driving ourselves crazy by continuing to dwell on one thought and wearing out the rut. Any line of thought that takes control of the mind will endanger a person's sanity--pride, resentment, jealousy, something created with much effort, an opinion thought up.

Constant Regeneration of Brain Tissue

If even non-active thinking and feeling expends brain energy and causes tissues to be replaced, how much more strain on the brain must it take to do physical movement, like walking or writing! Yet such is the case. To repair brain tissue, the brain needs a lot of nourishment. In fact, a fifth or sixth of the body's blood is dedicated to feeding and replacing brain tissue. New brain tissue is growing at a tremendous rate. One wonders how long it takes before the entire brain has been totally replaced, and at what age a child no longer has any of the original tissue of the brain he had at birth!

The new brain tissue is not an exact replica of the old. Just like any muscles that are grown to accommodate the kind of activity they'll be required to do, the brain

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also grows its new tissue to accommodate the activity required of it, whether it be telling the body how to work or just non-active thinking that the person has been doing. One physiologist said that the brain grows to accommodate the kind of thinking that it has gotten used to. Dr. Carpenter said that any sequence of brain activity that has been done again and again tends to continue in the same way until it becomes automatic. That's why we tend to think or do what we've done before without ever having made a conscious decision to do it that way. The brain is not an exception to the rules that govern the rest of the body. Just like muscles that grow to best perform what has been required of them, the brain also regenerates new tissue to accommodate what has been required of it. In other words, even the act of thinking, if it's done habitually, makes a real impression in the physical substance of the brain [what was abstract becomes tangible.] Once that physical impression is there, any suggestion or stimulus later will rouse it.

We Can Acquire Reflex Actions

Huxley said that the brain develops many acquired reflex actions. The first time we respond to something, it takes our full concentration at each step. The second time, it's a little easier. After a few times, we can do it without much thought. If we do it often enough, we can practically do it in our sleep. We do it without even thinking about it.

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It takes a soldier a long time to learn instant response, such as snapping to attention the instant the command is given. But after he learns, just hearing the word will cause his body to snap to attention without his even thinking about it. There's a story about a practical joker who saw a discharged soldier carrying his dinner home. The joker called out, 'Attention!' and the poor soldier automatically snapped to attention with his hands at his sides--and dropped his burger and fries all over the sidewalk. The soldier's training had been so thorough that its effects were embedded in the man's mind and muscles.

Military drill is only one kind of education. All education is based on the ability of the body to process actions so that they become reflex or semi-automatic. If any two actions are habitually done one after another, the connection will be made until eventually the first action will automatically cause the second action, whether we like it or not. [Think of Pavlov's dog: following a bell with food eventually caused dogs to salivate from just hearing the bell alone; the first action--the bell--caused the second--salivating--without the dogs even trying.]
Intellectual and Moral Education

The purpose of academic education is to create these kinds of associations with the outside world. The purpose of a moral education is to create automatic associations so that the idea of doing evil is associated with pain, shame and blame while doing the right thing is associated with joy, satisfaction and honor. [End of Huxley's comment]

But it's the concept of mind and matter coming together so that abstract becomes physical tissue that's important to the teacher. We have described this process rather unscientifically as the brain making

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a rut. Habitual thoughts produce a rut in the brain tissue. A new thought, when it encounters this rut, will find it to be the path of least resistance. As thoughts travel along this rut, making a well-worn path, it becomes a busy highway for successive habits and thoughts.

Character is Affected by Changes in Brain Tissue

What does this mean? It means that the ruts that make up the paths that a child's thoughts will travel on depend on his parents to lay down. Whatever habits they encourage or allow will become the child's character. Once certain mental habits are established, they are inclined to continue forever--unless a new habit displaces them. This should end the idea that 'It doesn't matter,' or 'Oh, leave him alone, he'll grow out of it,' or 'He's so little, what do you expect?' Every hour, every day, parents are either passively allowing, or actively encouraging, the habits that will determine the future character and behavior of their children.

Outside Influence

And now we must consider the influence of others. We adults often do something a certain way because we saw someone else do it--we do it a few times and it becomes our habit. If it's this easy for us grown-ups to adopt a new habit, it's ten times easier for children. This is the trouble of training good habits. The mother must always be on the alert, watching her children for any bad habits they may be picking up from caregivers or other children, and she must nip them in the bud.

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VII. The Forming Of A Habit: 'Shut The Door After You'

Do the Next Thing

If you don't do it now, you'll be in the same state
Tomorrow, the next day, you will still hesitate.
Trying to decide causes more delays
And some day you'll weep over all the lost days.

is a paraphrase of a poem by Marlowe who, like many of us, knew the misery of wasted days because his laziness prevented him from simply doing the next thing. All matters concerning the raising of children are important, and dealing with procrastination is very important. We have already mentioned that the stress of making decisions is the greatest effort we face in life. It isn't doing a thing that's hard, but making up our minds which thing to do first. Often, indecision causes a person to be shiftless, which grows into a habit of dawdling. How is a procrastinating child cured? By hoping she'll grow out of it with time? No, 'tomorrow, the next day, you will still hesitate,' will be the story of her life, with the exception of short bursts. Can it be cured with punishment? No, a procrastinator is often passively resigned to her fate, and will endure punishment without ever trying to change. Can a reward tempt her to change? No, because getting so close to attaining the reward and then watching it slip through her fingers will seem like a punishment, which she will endure stoically. What can be done if rewards and punishments are ineffective? How about the educator's remedy--Replace one habit with another one! Chronic dawdling is a bad habit that can only be cured

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by replacing it with the opposite habit. The mother should plan to spend a few weeks working on the cure as steadily and consistently as she would tend her child if she was sick. She should point out as briefly as possible how a life can suffer because of dawdling, and that the child has a duty to overcome it. The less talking about it, the better. Once the child agrees that changing this habit is the right thing to do, the mother simply makes sure that the child doesn't dawdle. The child might be dressing to go for a walk. Her mind wanders as she ties her sneakers; her hand is motionless over the laces, but she remembers her commitment and she suddenly looks up. She sees her mother watching her, hopeful and expectant [rather than exasperated and impatient]. She goes back to her shoelaces. Then, while tying the other shoe, there's another pause, but shorter this time. She looks up again, sees her mother, and resumes her tying. The pauses becomes less and less frequent, she manages to stay on task more and more often. Her young will is getting stronger, and prompt doing becomes her habit. After the initial talk, the mother shouldn't say another word on the subject. Her look (expectant, not scolding) and, when needed, a light reminding touch, are the only tools that will help. After a while, the mother might say, 'Do you think you can get ready in five minutes by yourself today?' 'Oh, yes, Mom.' 'Don't say yes unless you're absolutely sure.' 'I'll try.' And she does try, and she succeeds! At this point, it's very tempting to relax a little and overlook a little bit of dawdling since the poor girl has been trying so hard. But this is absolutely fatal. The truth is that the habit of dawdling has made very real and physical impressions in the brain--ruts. During the weeks that the child has been learning the new habit, brain tissue

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has been growing and replacing the old tissue, wiping out the rut, and a new rut for the new habit is being laid down with new tissue. To let the girl revert back to her old ways even once ruins everything. It takes a few weeks of work to build a new habit. Once the habit is in place, it must be guarded diligently to prevent a reversion to the old ways, but keeping watch is not stressful or difficult once the new habit is secure. One more thing--prompt action from the child deserves to be rewarded with leisure time to do whatever she pleases. This shouldn't be granted as a favor. She earned it and has a right to it. But the mother shouldn't use this as an opportunity to lecture.

Habit is a Delight in and Of Itself

Acquiring a habit takes some effort, but once the habit is in place, it is rewarding because a habit is pleasant in and of itself. It's easy to do something on auto-pilot, something that doesn't take a lot of thought or will power. This is what mothers often forget. They forget that habits, even the good ones, are a pleasure. When the child has formed a habit, the mother thinks that continuing to act out of habit is as tedious as it was at first when the child was having to make a conscious effort to form the habit. So she admires his effort and starts to think that he deserves some relaxation from doing the habit, a sort of reward. So she lets him break the habit every now and then to give him a rest, and then he can continue on keeping the habit. What she doesn't realize is that, after a break, he isn't continuing on, he has to start all over, only now it's harder because he has both habits and must make a decision each time about which one to follow. The little relaxation she thought would be a treat turns out to form a new bad habit that now has to be broken.

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In fact, the mother's misguided sympathy is the one thing that makes it so hard to train children in good habits. It is children's nature to take to habits as naturally as a baby takes to his mother's milk.

Tact, Watchfulness, and Persistence

Let's illustrate with an example. We'll use a habit that isn't of any major concern except as a courtesy to others--the habit of shutting the door when leaving or entering a room. The mother must arm herself with tact, watchfulness and persistence. With only these tools, she'll be surprised how readily her child picks up a new habit.

Stages in the Formation of a Habit

'Johnny,' says the mother in a cheerful voice, 'I have something I'd like you to do. I'd like you to remember that every time you go in or out of a room that someone else is sitting in, to close the door.'
'But, what if I forget?'
'I'll try to remind you.'
'But what if I'm in a hurry?'
'Even if you're in a hurry, I'd like you to stop and close the door.'
'Why?'
'Because it's polite to make others comfortable.'
'What if I come into the room just to get something?
'Then you can shut the door when you come in, and then shut it on the way out. Do you think you can remember?'
'I'll try.'

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'Okay. I'll watch to see how many times you forget.'

Johnny remembers the first couple of times, but then he's in a hurry. Halfway downstairs, his mother calls him back. She doesn't yell, 'Johnny, get back here and shut that door!' because she knows that summoning in that manner would be exasperating to anyone. Instead, she goes to the door and calls pleasantly, 'Johnny!' Johnny has made it outside by now and forgotten all about the door. He wonders what his mother wants. Stirred by curiosity, he comes back and finds her sitting in the room as if nothing happened. She looks up, glances at the door and says, 'Remember, I said I'd try to remind you.' 'Oh, I forgot,' says Johnny, a little sheepishly. He shuts the door, and he remembers a few more times.

But Johnny is rather young and forgets frequently. His mother will have to come up with a few means of reminding him, but she will be sure of two things: that Johnny never slips off without shutting the door, and that this matter is never a source of friction between them. Instead, she takes on the role of friendly ally, helping him to remember since his memory isn't always reliable. After twenty times of shutting the door without one slip-up, the habit begins to form. Johnny begins to close the door as a matter of course. His mother watches with delight as Johnny comes into the room, shuts the door, takes something from the table, and leaves, shutting the door behind him.

The Dangerous Stage

Now that Johnny always remembers to shut the door, his mother's satisfaction and sense of victory start to mingle with unreasonable pity. 'Poor Johnny,' she thinks. 'It's so good of him to take such

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trouble over such a little thing just because I asked him to.' She thinks that Johnny has been making an effort all this time for her sake. She forgets that now it's a habit and comes easily and naturally. Johnny doesn't even think about closing the door anymore, he just does it automatically. Now comes the critical moment. One day, Johnny is so preoccupied with some new treasure that his habit, which is not yet fully formed, lapses and he forgets. He's halfway down the stairs before he even thinks about the door. When he does think of it, he has a little prick of conscience, but not enough to make him go back and close the door. He pauses for a moment to see whether his mother will call him back. Meanwhile, she has noticed, but she's thinking, 'Poor thing, he's been so good about it for so long, I'll let it go this once.' Since he doesn't get called back, he thinks, 'Oh, it doesn't really matter,' and goes off to play. And the whole thing is undone.

The next time, he leaves the door open, but not because he forgot. His mother calls him back, but there's no conviction in her voice. Johnny hears the feebleness in her tone and doesn't even bother to turn around. He cries, 'Oh, Mom, I'm in such a hurry!' She says no more and closes the door for him. He runs off again, leaving the door wide open. 'Johnny,' she says, in a warning voice. 'I'm just coming in to get something,' he says. After ten minutes of rummaging for something, he goes back out--and forgets to close the door. His mother ill-timed easing of the habit undoes all she gained from her efforts.

VIII. Infant Habits

All habits, both physical and moral, that make everyday life run smoothly and properly,

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are accepted passively by the child as a matter of course. He doesn't put forth any attempt to form these habits, but he sees everyone around him doing things a certain way and his mind forms impressions that this is the way things are done. These first impressions become his strongest and most enduring habits.

Some Branches of Infant Education

Even infants are educated. The branches of their education are cleanliness, order, regularity and punctuality. If these things are all a normal part of his life, then he will absorb those concepts as naturally as he breathes in air, and they will be what he learns. Mothers don't need to be taught about cleanliness. They already bathe their babies and keep their little clothes clean. But for babies who spend most of their time with a caregiver, their cleanliness depends on the caregiver. There shouldn't be the faintest odor on the infant or on anything that belongs to him. His room should have fresh, ventilated air with no foul smells. Unfortunately, there are some who have an aversion to open windows. And some don't know the significance of odors. They assume that, since you can't see a smell, there's no physical matter there. But a smell is really microscopic particles and the child ingests them with every breath.

A Sensitive Nose

It is very important to teach a child to have a sensitive nose. A child should be able to sniff out even a little stuffiness in a room, or the faintest smell on furniture or clothes. Our sense of smell isn't just for our pleasure. It's also a warning signal to

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alert us to presence of harmful materials in the air. Yet many people seem to have no sense of smell at all. But evidence proves that a sense of smell can be developed with training and habit. The habit is easy to form. Encourage children to pay attention and note whether a room they enter smells fresh when they come in from outside. Have them try to smell the difference between city air and the fresh air of the country during an outing. Train children to notice the faintest trace of harmless odors and good smells.

Babies See and Hear Everything

It would be good if caregivers understood how babies notice everything. Babies not only hear everything and see everything, but they retain the impression of every sight and sound in their memories all their lives. A poem says, if there's a hole in your coat, patch it because a child among you is watching and will store that image in his long term memory--and the child will base his future behavior on the pattern of what he's already seen. If caregivers kept that thought in mind, they might be more careful to keep more than their uniforms neat and clean, they'd try to keep everything the child is exposed to clean. But two things they shouldn't do: make the child's bed first thing in the morning, and fold their play clothes when they go to bed. It would be better to stretch a clothesline across the room at night so they can hang up the clothes to be aired. This gets rid of the imperceptible perspiration from the day's wear. For the same reason, their sheets and blankets should be turned down to air out for a couple hours before making the beds.

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Personal Cleanliness as an Early Habit

The table where the children eat [in Charlotte's day, many children ate in the nursery, but our own children may eat at the counter or breakfast nook] should be as clean and attractive as the fancy dining room table. A child who sits down to a wrinkled or stained tablecloth, or uses a bent-up spoon, is degraded. Children should be encouraged to keep themselves clean and attractive. We have all seen a baby hold out his chubby little hand to be washed because it's sticky and he doesn't like it. If only they'd be as particular when they're old enough to wash their own hands! Not that children should always stay clean and tidy--they love to play in dirt and should have big aprons [or play clothes?] just for the occasion. They are like a little French prince who turned up his nose at his lavish birthday presents and begged instead to be allowed to make mud-pies with the little street urchin down the road. Let children make mud-pies as much as they want, but when they're done, they should be anxious to want every trace of mud cleaned off of them, and they should do it themselves. Young children should be able to clip their own fingernails and clean the corners of their eyes and wash behind their ears. No child should be allowed to sit at the table with dirty hands and messy hair. Children should have their own washing things and they should enjoy bathing and be able to care for themselves. There is no need for a five year old to endure soap in the eyes and hard scrubbing and being pulled and poked to get him clean. He should be able to get thoroughly clean by himself. A child doesn't form the habit of daily baths until he is doing it himself, and this habit needs to be established before the careless time of school life begins. [Perhaps Charlotte was thinking of children who went to boarding schools and were expected to take care of these things themselves?]

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Modesty and Purity (Victorian)

Bath time is an opportunity for the mother to teach habits of decency and a sense of modesty. It may be tempting to allow children to grow in an Eden-like atmosphere of innocence and simplicity. But we don't live in the Garden of Eden. The child should get used to the customs of the place he lives in from the beginning. Adam and Eve had something in the Garden that was forbidden, and even the youngest child can learn that he has something that is forbidden. When he's young enough to obey unquestioningly, let him know that God does not allow him to speak of, think of, display or handle all of his body unless it's for the purpose of cleaning. The mother can illustrate by explaining that God gave us lungs, heart, etc. that we may not see or touch, but these things have been sealed up inside our skin so we can't get to them. What is left open to us is like the forbidden fruit, given as a test of obedience. Disobedience results in certain loss and ruin, as Adam and Eve found out. [Remember as you read that Charlotte naturally reflects the Victorian culture she lived in.]

The Habit of Obedience and the Sense of Honor

Giving children a sense that some things are prohibited and that disobedience is sin will be a good way to keep some knowledge of evil from them. Even better is to give them a sense of honor, a duty. That was the motive the apostle Paul gave for his command on this subject. The mother might remind the child of this solemnly every year, perhaps on the eve of his birthday. She should give the child a sense that his obedience in this matter is his opportunity to 'glorify God in his body' [1 Cor. 6:20]. Encourage children to be on guard against every approach of evil. Mothers should pray every day that each of her children

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would remain pure. Ignoring the possibility of this kind of sin because the subject is awkward, exposes children to scary risks. But remember, too, that too much talk about this, even for the purpose of discouraging, may plant ideas and be a cause of sin. An active, busy child with lots of interests and things to do won't have time for secret vice.

Order is Essential

Everything already said about cleanliness also goes for order. There should be order in the nursery and orderly habits should be adhered to. First of all, the nursery shouldn't be the receptacle for all the broken or worn-out furniture from the rest of the home. Cracked cups, chipped plates, worn-out furnishings have no place in the children's room. Children should be brought up to consider stained, broken things as ruined and to be replaced. It seems like wasteful paradox, but children who learn that damaged things won't do will be more careful to take care of the things they have. And it isn't good for impressionable children to grow up always seeing imperfect, ugly junk.

Grown-ups who love to wait on children do them a disservice by not allowing them to learn to be orderly. Children are constantly leaving a trail of clutter everywhere they go. It's tempting to be sentimental about the toys they scatter and little flowers they pick and leave about, but the habit of cluttering should not be allowed. Shame on the mother whose families keep their drawers messy and whose

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things are always laying out. It is up to the mother to teach her children better habits. Disorder destroys the comfort of a family, and sometimes even their happiness. The mother probably was allowed to become disorderly as a child, and it's her own fault if she doesn't cure herself of it.

The Child of Two Should Put Away his Toys

Even a two-year-old can learn to get his own toys and put them away. Start young. Let it be a game to open his closet and put the doll or horse back in its place. If he always puts his own things away as a matter of course, it will become a habit faster than you think. Then the child will think it's nice to put his toys away, but unsettling to see things in the wrong place. A child who is tidy with his room will be an adult who is careful with his things. If parents would only understand the value of order, they would make it a priority to cultivate the habit. Training a habit of tidiness is no more of a bother than remembering to wind a clock. If someone remembers to wind it regularly, the clock ticks away on its own the rest of the time.

Neatness is Related to Order

Neatness is similar to order, but it  implies more than everything being put in its proper place. It also means things must look nice, and requires a sense of good taste. A little girl must not just put her flowers in any old jug of water, but she must arrange them nicely in a pretty vase with a delicate form

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and a harmonious color, even if it's just a cheap thing. In the same way, everything in the nursery should look nice. Children should be encouraged to arrange things in their rooms to look pleasing. Nothing clumsy or unworthy, whether it's a book or picture or toy, should be allowed in the room. It might spoil his discernment or encourage a taste for common, ugly things. But one or two carefully selected works of art might elevate and refine his taste, even if it's only an inexpensive reproduction.

Regular Schedules

[Note that Charlotte is reflecting baby care practices of the Victorian era, which are no longer recommended by childcare experts. Read more here.]

The need to have Baby on a schedule is becoming widely accepted. A young mother knows she must put her baby to bed at a proper time, even if he cries. She may have to let him cry two or three times before he learns to resign himself to go to sleep alone in his dark room without protest. There is much speculation about why a baby cries. Supposedly he wants his mother, or his milk, or the light on, and knows that if he cries, he will get what he wants. [Outdated; read article from Harvard University about why babies cry here, and the stress of babies whose cries are unheeded here.] 

Habits of Time and Place

But the real reason babies cry is because they've formed a habit of waking or eating at a certain time and don't like having their routine disturbed any more than a cat who dislikes changing homes. When the baby submits quietly to staying asleep, it is because a new habit is formed and he is content. Dr. Carpenter said that regular schedules for feeding and rest should begin in infancy. Habits

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formed in the body help shape mental habits later. But feeding a baby any time he wants, or letting the baby stay up when he should be sleeping just because he cries will spoil the baby. [Current research says that babies can't be spoiled. Read article by Dr. Spock here.] Like a puppy or a horse, a baby's behavior can be trained to be in harmony. The habit of regular schedules is also good for older children. On days that the regular school schedule isn't followed, children are more apt to misbehave.

IX. Physical Exercises

Important to Do Daily

The subject of training the eye and muscles was already discussed in the earlier section on Outdoor Life [starting on page 42]. I just want to add one more thing. The child should know the joy of managing his body with light, easy motion, like a good rider does on a horse. So every day should include some sort of physical exercise--dancing, calisthenics, or other exercise. Swedish drill [military calisthenics that were popular at the time, see a photo of children doing their drill] is especially valuable, and can be done with the youngest children. Alertness and quickness in exercise can carry over to focused eye contact, prompt response and intelligent replies, but often children who are otherwise obedient don't have these qualities because they haven't had enough physical training.

Good Manners Role Playing Drills

Children can do little drills to practice their manners. This can be done in the form of skits. Megan can pretend to be a lady asking the way to the grocery store, Harrison can be the boy who directs her there, etc.

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They should be as exact as possible, even to the position of their head, keeping hands from fidgeting, making eye contact. Children can make up hundreds of situations to play at, and figure out the proper way to act in each. They will enjoy a few helpful tips from their teacher. This is best done when children are young, before they become typically self-conscious. Encourage them to value light springing movements and to want to move that way, rather than with a heavy gait and clumsy manner.

Training of the Ear and Voice

Training the ear and voice is an important part of culture. Practice drills where children make pure vowel sounds, crisply enunciated consonants, and defined ending consonants. Don't let them get into habits of low-bred dialects, such as 'walkin' and 'talkin.' Let them practice saying hard words: imperturbability, anticlericalism, imperviousness. They can try saying them perfectly after hearing them once. They can try saying just the vowels of the word, and then just the consonants. Teaching French orally [by speaking and listening] is very valuable for training the ear and voice.

The Habit of Music

It's hard to know how many musically talented people were born that way, and how many grew into it by growing up hearing music and trying to reproduce it. In other words, music developed because it was made a habit as a result of living with a musical family. A Mr. Hullah insisted that the ability to sing was a trained skill that every child should be taught to have. Even that may have some inborn talent involved. It's too bad that most children's musical training is random. Few are trained with graduated ear and

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voice exercises to make notes and distinguish between musical tones.

Let Children Alone

One last word about habit--the point of training children to have good habits is so that they'll do things without being nagged or scolded. Then the mother isn't constantly chasing them down with a barrage of commands and reminders. She can leave them alone to thrive in their own way once habit has secured a boundary for them to grow in. Gardeners dig and prune and train their peach trees, but that only occupies a small fraction of the tree's existence. Most of the time, the gardener lets the fresh air, sunshine and rain do its work. The result is juicy peaches. But if the gardener doesn't do his small part, his peaches will be more like hard, bitter sloes.



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Paraphrased by L. N. Laurio
Please direct any comments or questions to me by emailing me at cmseries-owner at yahoogroups dot com.

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