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Charlotte Mason in Modern English
Charlotte Mason's ideas are too important not to be understood and implemented in the 21st century, but her Victorian style of writing sometimes prevents parents from attempting to read her books. This is an imperfect attempt to make Charlotte's words accessible to modern parents. You may read these, print them out, share them freely--but they are copyrighted to me, so please don't post or publish them without asking.
~L. N. Laurio
pg 280
Chapter 26 - The Eternal Child
Humility:
the Highest Road to Godly Character
Listen to the carolers!
Slowly they play, poor careful Souls,
With wistful thoughts of Christmas joy,
Not realizing how their music eases
The weariness of the passing year.
And hearing their charming, simple song,
Our thoughts return to the innocence of our childhood
When our very heart beat in time
To the rhythm of the stars.
[from a poem by John Davidson]
Children
are Necessary to Christmas Joy
In these days of equality, we like to think that everyone has the same
opportunities in one direction or another. But not everything can be
appreciated by everyone in the same way. Take Christmas joy, for
example. Sometimes, those who are in need, or in sorrow, or suffering
from some other hardship can enjoy the Christmas season with joy and
thanksgiving because extra blessings are often bestowed on them. But it
takes the presence of a child to help us realize the concept of Christ,
the Eternal Child. The Spirit of the baby Jesus is with the children,
and their presence makes us see the season through their eyes and take
joy in
their delight. Every mother
pg 281
rejoices in fullness of her own heart, and that makes her truly
understand what the birth at Bethlehem means. Even those of us who
don't have children catch some of that joy. We hear the wondrous
Nativity story read in church, the carolers sing the tale, the church
bells ring it, and fond memories of our own childhoods come back to us,
making us humble and gentle, loving and sweet like little children.
Unfortunately, it only lasts for a little while until the thought
fades. All too soon, the dreariness of our mundane daily routine
settles down on us again, and we have to admit that we start to get
impatient with the cheerfulness that's expected of us at Christmas.
But it's not that way where there are children. The old, old story
seems fresh and new as we tell it to the eager listeners. As we listen
to it ourselves with all of their enthusiasm and rapt attention, it
becomes as fresh and real to us as it is for them. Our harsh thoughts
drop away from our minds like scales from our eyes. The children's
young life makes us feel young again, and we're vaguely aware that,
somehow, this is eternal life. What a mystery it is! Doesn't every
mother who's experienced salvation feel with an apprehensive awe that
when Jesus said, 'The same is my mother,' that it applies to her,
too? [Matt 12:50; Mark 3:35]
Every
Baby Bears Witness of Christ
Every child is a true St. Christopher--a literal 'Christ carrier.' The
light and life of Jesus are within him. Every baby's birth is a message
of salvation, as well as a reminder that we need to humble ourselves
and become like little children. Maybe this is the secret of the
world's progress--that every baby comes into the world with a message
of hope and good news, and it can't help but to witness to his parents'
hearts. We're also God's children, and He wants us to be like children.
That's the message, and
pg 282
the newborn infant never fails to deliver it, even if we ignore it or
forget it soon after we hear it. It's good for parents to reflect on
these things because the child's state is a holy one, and it's the
duty of parents to protect the little heir of blessedness.
Children
Are Humble
It isn't possible to treat such a big subject comprehensively, but it
might be useful to look at two or three characteristics of the child's
state. After all, how can we protect what we don't even recognize, and
how can we recognize something that we haven't given a careful look at?
The mark of childhood is, more than anything else, humility. What we
call innocence probably works like grace--it's offensive to man's
nature
until he crosses over and accepts and embraces it, and then he
recognizes that it's something divine. An old, saintly writer, William
Law, has an enlightening thought on this subject of humility:
'There has only been and only will be one humility in the whole world,
and that's Christ's humility. No man since the fall of Adam has the
smallest amount of humility unless it comes from Christ. Humility is
one in the same sense and truth that Christ is one, the Mediator is
one, redemption is one . . . There aren't two Lambs of God that take away the
sin of the world. But if there was some other humility other than
Christ's, then there'd have to be something else that could take away
the sin of the world.' Now, if there's only one humility in the world,
and if that humility is Christ's humility, and if Jesus said that
little children are humble, it must be because of the divinity that
dwells in them. It must be the glory in children that we call
innocence.
pg 283
Humility
Isn't Relative, It's Absolute
Our common concept of humility isn't quite accurate. We tend to think
that it's a relative quality--we humble ourselves to this person or
that person, we bow to princes and lord it over commoners. That's why,
if we're really honest with ourselves, the quality of humility doesn't
appeal to us. We feel like humility isn't consistent with self-respect
and the kind of independent character we value. We've been taught that
humility is a Christian trait, so we don't voice our distaste out loud.
But this misconception makes us confused about a subject that's very
important. Humility is absolute, it isn't relative. It has nothing to
do with taking our place among our peers according to some scale, as if
some are on a higher level than we are, and others are a few grades
below us. The Bible makes no reference to a humble soul being above or
below others. A humble person is just as humble whether he's with a
baby, a beauty, a villain, a beggar, or a prince.
If we think about it, that's the way children are naturally. Everything
and everybody draws their attention because everything and everybody
seems so interesting to them. A little prince pleads, 'Please, can't I
go make mud pies with the boy in the street?' He can't see any
difference at all, and the little boy in the street would be just as
unaffected if he were to meet the prince.
Children
Don't Make Critical Comments About Themselves
What's the secret of this absolute humility that can be equally humble
to people of lower or higher class, and is oblivious to those kinds of
distinctions? We tend to think that a humble person is someone who
thinks negatively about himself. We think of a person who says things
like, 'I can't do that, I'm just not that talented,' or, 'I'm not cut
out for work with the public, I don't have any ability to influence
people,' or,
pg 284
'I hope he'll be a better person than me; I don't think much of
myself, anyway,' or, 'Your children are so blessed. I wish my children
had a mother like you, but I don't have the kind of wisdom you do.'
These kinds of things are often said without the least hint of Uriah
Heep's pathetic self-depreciatory sentiment. The thing I have a problem
with is that those who use these comments tend to think that, if
nothing else, at least they have the saving grace of humility. It's
worthwhile to remember that the Bible doesn't give any evidence that
Jesus, the Example of humility that we're supposed to follow, ever made
those
kinds of self-depreciating remarks. Since there's no evidence that
Jesus, who was all humility, had any of this kind of humility, then we
should rethink our idea of what humility is. Children don't make
self-depreciating remarks, either. That's because they're humble. With
Jesus and children as our example of humility, we can be sure that
humility has nothing to do with thinking too little of ourselves.
Humility is a higher principle and a blessed state that very few
grown-ups ever attain, but children live there naturally, and it's
God's will that we should let them stay in that state of natural
humility.
Humility
is Unconscious of Self
Humility doesn't think too highly of itself, and it doesn't think too
little of itself. In fact, it doesn't think of itself at all. It's not
a quality that you have, but
a quality that you don't
have. It's the absence of self-consciousness, not the presence of a
specific virtue. A person who is unaware of himself is capable of all
kinds of lowly tasks, all kinds of suffering for others, and being
cheerful and optimistic in the face of small anxieties and frustrations
in everyday life. This is the quality that makes heroes and saints. We
might be capable of praying, but we can't truly worship or praise and
say, 'My soul magnifies
pg 285
the Lord,' if we're self-absorbed in the innermost chambers of our
hearts.
The
Christian Religion is Very Objective
By its very nature, Christianity is objective. It offers a Divine
Person Who is the Desire of the World for us to worship, reverence,
serve, adore and delight in. Simplicity, happiness and a broadened
heart result from a heart being outpoured upon on something that is
completely worthy. But we mistake what we really need, we're
preoccupied with our own falls and our own repentance, and our many
states of consciousness. We seem to think that our religion is more
subjective than objective. But it's the opposite. Our religion is
objective first, and if we still have any time or care to think about
ourselves, it's partly subjective after that.
Children
Tend to Be Objective
Children tend to be totally objective, not at all subjective. Maybe
that's why they're said to be the first in the kingdom of heaven. This
isn't some abstract philosophical distinction that has no bearing on
everyday life. It's part of the key for training children. The more our
training develops a subjective focus, the more it lowers our children's
purpose, character and usefulness throughout their whole lives. But the
more we develop the objective focus that our children are born with,
the more we make them capable of love, service, heroism, and worship.
Every
Function May Have its Subjective or Objective Development
It's interesting to notice how every function of our complex human
nature can have a subjective and an objective side. It's possible for a
child to eat and drink and rest with absolutely no
pg 286
regard for those details because his parents take care of arranging
those things in his best interests while making sure that his focus is
never turned to the pleasures of appetite. But we don't need to dwell
on this. Conscientious parents have no problem planning their
children's meals so that they're usually pleasant and varied enough for
the child to eat contentedly, with little or no thought about what he's
eating. Most parents are careful enough that children aren't overly
self-obsessed about what they eat.
Endurance
But parents are less aware of the need to control their child's bodily
sensations. We still kiss their boo-boo to make it better, and make an
obvious fuss if a string is uncomfortable or a seam is irritating our
child's tender skin. We've forgotten the seven Christian virtues and
the seven deadly sins from earlier generations. As we raise our
children, we don't really consider whether our children are developing
the grace of endurance. Now, endurance has higher and lower roles. It's
concerned with matters of the mind as well as physical things. I think
it's safe to argue that endurance is only possible on the higher plane
when it's become a habit in the lower [physical]
nature. Babies can be
trained to endure, and they'll be much happier for it. A child should
learn that it's beneath him to notice cold, heat, pain or discomfort.
We don't notice the bodily sensations that we don't focus on. It's
possible to forget even a bad toothache if we're absorbed in some new
and fascinating interest. Health and happiness are largely a matter of
how much we can disregard sensations. The child who's encouraged to say
things like, 'I'm freezing!' or, 'I'm so tired,' or, 'This shirt is
scratching me,'
pg 287
is more likely to become a hypochondriac or a hysterical adult because,
just like our appetites, it's a strict law that, the more focus we put
on bodily sensations, the more they'll dominate us until the slightest
sensation of
pain or discomfort will overshadow our entire consciousness. Then we
become unable to perceive any joy in living, or beauty in the earth.
A
Child Who's Focused on Himself Is No Longer Humble
But these are only the least important reasons why children should be
trained to put up with minor discomforts and take no notice of them. A
child who has been allowed to become self-aware of his sensations is in
the same predicament as the child who's obsessed about his
appetites--he has lost his child's condition. He's no longer humble,
he's in a state where he's thinking about himself instead of that
blessed condition of not being aware of himself at all. And we can't
let ourselves make an exception for unhealthy or handicapped children.
It's even more important for them than for healthy children to learn
not to focus on their bodily sensations. There are many brave, heroic
little children who endure affliction without any conscious thought.
Because of that, their suffering is infinitely less than it would be if
they were persuaded to dwell on their pains. I say persuaded because,
although a child might cry when he feels a sudden discomfort, he
doesn't really think about his aches and pains unless the people around
him turn his thoughts to his ailments.
Not a
Spartan Regimen
I'm not advocating a harsh Spartan regimen. We should never
deliberately inflict harshness on a child to teach him to endure. Our
concern is merely to redirect their awareness away from their own
physical sensations. There's a well-known
pg 288
story about a man who had to have his leg amputated before there was
any
such thing as anesthesia. He endured it without any conscious
sensations of pain because he determined to keep his mind occupied with
other things. That's an extreme but noteworthy example of what can be
done in the area of sensations. At the same time, while the child
should be taught to disregard his own sensations, they should be
carefully watched by his parents. They should consider and act on any
danger signals that the child might miss because he's learned to
disregard them. But it's usually possible to keep an eye on a child's
sensations without him being aware that they're being observed.
The
Altruistic Direction, or the Egotistic Direction?
This issue of sensations is only one example of how the operations of a
child's complex nature can go in an altruistic direction, or an
egotistic direction. In the same way, his affections are another area
that can become subjective (self-focused) or objective
(outward/others-focused), depending on the suggestions that he receives
from
those around him.
Every child is born into the world with an overflowing wellspring of
love and an abundant fountain of justice. But whether the stream of
love flows to the right or the left and becomes altruistic or egotistic
depends on the child's earliest training. A child who learns the first
pleasures of giving, sharing, loving and enduring, from his earliest
years will always give of himself freely for others, loving and giving
without seeking anything in return. But the child who discovers that
he's the center of attention, concern, love and doting will become
self-obsessed, self-seeking, and selfish, almost without fail. That's
how
strongly children are influenced by the kinds of thoughts they get from
those around them. It's the same with the sense of fairness that all
children are born with. Their stream of justice can flow in one
direction or the other, but it can't be
pg 289
both egotistic and
altruistic. The child's need for justice may be spent all for himself,
or,
from the very beginning, he can be made aware of the rights of others.
'It's
Not Fair!'
Children can learn to be preoccupied with their own rights and what
other people owe them. You can easily
tell
which ones grew up this way by the constant complaint that comes out of
their mouths: 'That isn't
right!' 'It's not fair!' On the other hand, a child can be made so
aware of his own obligations to
others and the rights of others that
his own demands slip quietly into the background. This kind of result
only comes with prayer, but it's wise for us to clarify our thoughts
and decide specifically what we desire for our children. That's the
only way we can work intelligently towards our goal. It's a tragic
thing to pray for something and then undermine our own results by what
we do, but it's quite possible to do just that.
During each Nativity season, as we reflect on the Eternal Child, may
parents reflect on the best way to keep their own children in the happy
condition of childhood. Let's remember that the humility that Jesus
praised in the little children was what could be philosophically
described as objective rather
than subjective. As a child
becomes
more conscious of his own self in any aspect of his life, he loses the
blessing of humility. That's the basic principle. Putting it into
action takes constant watchfulness and diligent efforts, especially
during the holidays, to keep friends and family from showing their love
in ways that will encourage children to become more conscious of
themselves.
Humility
is the Highest Road to Godly Character
This matter of humility isn't just a path to godly character,
pg 290
but might possibly be the highest
road to godly character. It's a noble effort, and we suggest it to
parents because we're confident that no endeavor is too difficult, no
aim too high for those who are doing the most important part of
advancing Christ's Kingdom by raising godly children.
The
End
Paraphrased by L. N. Laurio
Please direct any comments or questions to me by emailing me at cmseries-owner at yahoogroups dot com.
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